Yes, YES! Don’t you love encountering other Christians in non-church settings? I’m always amazed and blessed at this. Two people, who were strangers before, now have a rich source connection all because of Him. Ain’t it grand?
So my last post was very melancholy and this brief one is in response to it. Here is my response. I began work today with a construction crew that I have never seen before. The other non-Amish fellow has been a professional chef for the past fifteen years and decided to learn a new trade while he waits to find a cooking job that suits him. Oh, he’s also a Christian. Before I knew what happened, I mentioned to him some of the questions I am currently facing. As we were walking together, he taps my nail pouch and said something I don’t think I’ll ever forget. “God doesn’t give you all your tools at once; He only gives the ones you need to face the next task.” Those words still ring in my mind. It brings to mind a verse in Jeremiah.
Jer 12:5 “If you have run with the footmen, and they have wearied you, Then how can you contend with horses? And if in the land of peace, In which you trusted, they wearied you, Then how will you do in the floodplain of the Jordan?
Yes, praise Jesus, there is strength for the journey!
It was one of those nights where sleep would not come. Tossing and turning, I lay desperate to discover sleep somewhere but failed. Determining the room was too warm, I cracked the window but the January breeze did not bring the sleep I sought. In the silence of the night I stared at the questions that life is currently bringing me. I say stared but I did not see a thing for my eyes were closed. Questions raced through my head at warp speed. Repetitive questions such as . . . should I continue my education past Faith Builders? If so, where? Was Faith Builders worth the time and money? Should I not have been more “responsible” and made some money prior to studying at Faith Builders? Should I be “responsible” now and make some money prior to completing my bachelor’s degree? But will I become sidetracked and not complete my degree? If that happens would I be satisfied with what I already know? Am I being too maverick in this pursuit of knowledge? Looking back, should I have remained at home instead of learning the culture and language of Paraguay? Would it have been better to possess the security of multiple dozens of Benjamins instead of an appreciation for terere? Maybe I should have pursued my degree and have it now in hand instead of a fluency of Spanish in my head? Perhaps the years since I’ve come of age were lived as mistakes, by-products of bad decisions?
Interspersed with these questions were short and silent prayers to the One who oversees all. And yet, the gray haze of the room gave no answers. Only the unceasing brigade of questions that did not stop until I fell asleep.